What's an empathetic hook and should you use one?

Digging deep on hooks PART TWO

I often get frustrated at how some of my deeper knowledge around content marketing is not “most client suitable.” This sort of stuff can make a learner feel either really excited or super overwhelmed when we’re also focusing on so many other parts of their content.

But I laos know this stuff is where we get the really good learning - and there HAS to be those of you out there who might like to push yourself a bit deeper yeah?

So for at least the next series of substacks on a Wednesday I thought I’d ask you if we could go DEEP. just on one very important part of content marketing.

Because I want to teach you a bit more about HOOKS - Those things that get people noticing and reading/ watching your content

(and if you’re reading this and you’re not a paying subscriber would you consider it? I’ve set this at a HEFTY $5 a month - and it’s there so I can prioritize this writing in my week of other paid work AND for you - so you get access to the library of all of this content for your own marketing knowhow)

This week we’re talking EMPATHETIC HOOKS

As the name indicates these are to help you and your audience bond over shared experiences, pain, and learning. They are to help take the person listening or reading on a journey from your admission of where you used to be, a struggle they will relate to, and a validation that it’s a normal experience

With this type of hook your audience will know you get them, you’ve been there, and you are a “lived mentor” you understand why they get frustrated, why you understand the pain of hope deferred, or how to move past a crippling fear or disappointment.

What this gives the listener

When we take direct to an experience we both share, it helps build a deeper connection with your audience faster. It reduces resistance to your message if you’re teaching something. It helps build connection and trust. And it also makes you relatable. Using this type of hook to start a story helps people know you are talking with them, sharing your story rather than talking AT them. It makes it easier for the listener to learn, as you’ve created a scaffold between a common experience and your movement past that to the next stage of your learning journey.

What sort of people love this kind of hook

Not every hook is for every person (which is why we use different types. And these hooks will hit your audience best if you’ve first taken the time to create a full psychographic profile on your ideal client and used that to identify what shared experiences you are most likely to best connect over, and their key psychological buying triggers.

(We then select one experience, and one trigger to build out the story starting with that hook)

Empathetic hooks work best with people who are in a state of overwhelm as it’s hitting them in a "feeling space”. They also work with people who have felt talked AT by other experts, and are looking for an expert who’s had experience in similar areas to them

This type of hook also appeals to people who are highly value driven and want to know if your values are aligned with theirs before they make a purchasing decision.

Using them in these industries is a natural fit

Not all hooks fit all types of businesses or content! But this type of hook is a perfect fit for you us coaches, consultants , ad anyone working in a service based business where trust in your ability to empathise and your past experience, and values are key deciding factors

They also work with anyone in the fitness industry, health and wellness and anything connected to personal development.

You can also use them in product based businesses if you’ve either got a strong values proposition, you need to educate to help people understand the benefits of your product or to help them understand the deeper purpose of what you are selling.

This type of hook may not work well if you’re in a highly regulated industry such as law or finance. It also might not be a great fit for luxury brands as reliability tends not to be a massive buying driver for those buying luxury items or services.

You also can avoid these if you’ve got a service that’s all about “in and out” with speed, and people aren’t selecting you due to your personal connection

Don’t use them to grow your audience but use them here instead

When it comes to the different stages of the customer journey, the empathetic hook is a no go for your audience growth strategy or what I call the NOTICED stage.(yeah sure a story with one of these beauties might go viral every now and again but it’s rare)

It’s also not the best fit for the buying stage (or what I call YOURS) as it doesn't provide enough buying signals, or fit a strong call to action to buy.

However these hooks work very well in the messy middle of the CONNECTED (How I do / did the thing) and the NURTURED (why I understand you) stage. Both stages are there to help build trust, help people connect with us and build authority.

If you do decide to use it as a transition piece of content to move people towards the YOURS stage, it can be used as a “working with a client” skewed story, with how you fixed a tricky situation

In my four part email structure, this type of hook and the rest of the content would fit best in a Week two, or Week three structure.

enough about the WHY - LET’S DIG DEEP INTO THE HOW

There are three key components of an empathetic hook

1. Identify a relatable pain or fear

(eg overwhelm, self doubt, confusion)

2. Validate it clearly

( eg: you’re not the only one, it can feel hard, used to feel like failure)

3. Show a way forward.

(eg: this is where it all changed, it did not to stay that way, it doesn’t have to be this way)

If we use these three sections our hooks can look a bit like this:

I used to think that ________ meant I’ve never been able to _________________. Here’s what actually happened.

If you’ve ever felt ________________, then this is for you

Let’s be honest: __________________ can feel impossible sometimes.

Now before you start launching yourself into a medley of empathy heavy hooks, do make sure it validates the person listening or reading it without making it also sound like it wasn’t a big ideal. If they find it hard, and you find it hard, say so.

The action or movement forward is key too, as we need the hope in there. There needs to be an active promise that things can get better because they did for you.

Examples of empathetic hooks

Ever feel like you’re barely holding everything together? You’re not the only one and I promise you, it doesn’t have to feel so hard.

If you've ever felt you’re not good enough, I want to tell you that I used to feel that way too.

It’s time to admit it, It’s rough showing up all the time. But what I've learned is it’s easier to find your people when you do

I used to see working all the hours as proof I was a serious business owner. All that did was make me burnt out

Ready to build one yourself?

Use this to help work out what it needs to include:

1. THE PAIN

If you’ve ever felt (THE PAIN)

2. ADD VALIDATION

…you’re not alone

3. SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE

I used to (add struggle or belief)

4. ADD HOPE OR POSITIVE OUTCOME

And now I xxxx

Oh and if you are stuck on a pain point, here’s a few to get you started…

Mindset

• Fear of not being good enough

• Everyone else has their shit together

• It’s too late

Overwhelm/ Time

• I’m drowning in everything

• I can’t stop my brain

• I’m so tired but can’t get off the rollercoaster

Fear of being judged

• People might think I’m a fake

• What if people troll me/ laugh at me

• I need to be liked

Fiances/ Stability

• What if I fail and my family suffers?

• What if people say I'm too expensive?

• What if I go all in and fail?

• What if people don’t like me when I’m successful?

Comparison

• I’m so far behind

• I can’t keep up

• I’m not good enough

Tech

• I’m too old to learn

• I can’t cope with social media

• Tech and me aren’t friends

OH - AND This is teaching I want to keep on doing. PLEASE do comment if this was useful - I respond well to positive reinforcement 😀I also want to make the commitment to you that this will NEVER be written by AI….